What are my new year resolutions? How do I hope to grow and change this year? What am I looking forward to most?
For the last 40 years, I’ve been chasing dreams and trying to make a name for myself. I bought into all the empty promises this world is selling and lost myself. Last year was particularly a tough season, but the lessons learned during this difficult time helped me realize this journey really isn’t about becoming someone. Rather it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t me, so that I can become who I was made to be from the beginning.
Realizing this was huge for me, but I still struggle daily to find the courage necessary to continue doing what I’m called to do; and to share the good news of Jesus. It feels like I’m constantly being attacked. I’ve had business deals taken away form me because of how “loud” I am about my savior. I’ve been called a business liability because the world doesn’t like what I have to say. Friends think I’m crazy because I believe there is nothing like His amazing love and that everything without Jesus is nothing; but I can’t stop and won’t stop.
I’ve been given freedom and an incredible gift and must to share the truth. My hope for this year is that as I’m being tested, it will become easier and easier for me to find courage in His promise. I hope to live my life in a way that looks less like this world and more like Jesus. I want to stand with the less fortunate, listen to voices unheard, and recognize potential where others see despair and hopelessness. I hope to find the wisdom and humility to see the world as it is and the courage to imagine the world as it could be.
This unshakeable courage isn’t going to develop over a new year’s resolution and without hard work. I have to remember that I can’t chase the trophy without realizing it’s the reps in the gym that’s the real goal. I need to put in the hard work and mediate on his law and love what He commands.
I used to believe that the meaning to life is to give life a meaning. Now I trust in his purpose for me and know that no matter my success or failure, it’s all the same in his eyes. I look forward to going deeper and surrendering all my plans to Jesus.